Storyline

The Phil Silvers Show, originally titled You'll Never Get Rich, was a sitcom which ran on CBS from 1955 to 1959 for 142 episodes, plus a 1959 special. The series starred Phil Silvers as Master Sergeant Ernest G. Bilko of the United States Army. The series was created and largely written by Nat Hiken, and won three consecutive Emmy Awards for Best Comedy Series. The show is sometimes titled Sergeant Bilko or simply Bilko in reruns, and is very often referred to by these names, both on-screen and by viewers. The show's success transformed Silvers from a journeyman comedian into a star, and writer-producer Hiken from a highly-regarded behind-the-scenes comedy writer into a publicly recognized creator.

First Aired

1955-09-20
Last Aired

2001-03-14
Creator

Nat Hiken
Genre

Comedy
Seasons

4
Episodes

144
Status

Ended
Language

English
Network

CBS

Keywords:

us army kansas, usa military sitcom small time crook

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Season 1

Season 2

Season 3

Season 4

1. New Recruits

During a poker game the other sergeant's cheat and clean Bilko out of his bankroll so he has to look ...More

During a poker game the other sergeant's cheat and clean Bilko out of his bankroll so he has to look around for some more money. Just when it looks like he will miss out a new squad of rookies arrive for basic training. With a new source of cash the platoon think he can get back into the game but Bilko's conscience will not let him.Less

30mins 1955-09-20

2. The Empty Store

Bilko is still broke and can't find a way back into the big poker game. When the three sergeant's win ...More

Bilko is still broke and can't find a way back into the big poker game. When the three sergeant's win again, by beating one of the new recruits, Bilko decides to get even by renting an empty store and getting the sergeant's to invest in itLess

30mins 1955-09-27

3. The WAC

A job comes up for a sergeant that has a jeep allocated Bilko applies for it only to find that he is b...More

A job comes up for a sergeant that has a jeep allocated Bilko applies for it only to find that he is beaten by a Sgt Joan Hogan. (1st appearance by Elisabeth Fraser As Joan Hogan)Less

30mins 1955-10-04

4. The Horse

Bilko loses the platoon welfare money on a horse only to find out that it is suffering from a minor le...More

Bilko loses the platoon welfare money on a horse only to find out that it is suffering from a minor leg injury, with the last of the platoon's money he buys the horse and has to keep it on the post until it is fit to run Then a visiting general comes on a surprise visitLess

30mins 1955-10-11

5. AWOL

Pvt Steve Nagy goes awol so Bilko has to go and fetch him back only to find himself caught up in the m...More

Pvt Steve Nagy goes awol so Bilko has to go and fetch him back only to find himself caught up in the middle of a family feudLess

30mins 1955-10-18

6. The Boxer

Bilko discovers that one of the platoon Claude Dillingham is a boxing champ so Bilko enters him for th...More

Bilko discovers that one of the platoon Claude Dillingham is a boxing champ so Bilko enters him for the interplatoon championship only to learn that Dillingham refuses to fightLess

30mins 1955-10-25

7. The Hoodlum

After several transfers a young tough guy is moved to the motor pool platoon and it is left to the Bil...More

After several transfers a young tough guy is moved to the motor pool platoon and it is left to the Bilko to cut him down to size. Meanwhile Bilko is after the ' Soldier of the Month' competition. Little does he know that the tough guy will spring a surprise.Less

30mins 1955-11-01

8. Mardi Gras

When the platoon ask local socialite Miss Joy Landers to be their Mardi Gras queen she laughs and turn...More

When the platoon ask local socialite Miss Joy Landers to be their Mardi Gras queen she laughs and turns them down flat, so Bilko finds a way to change her mind.Less

30mins 1955-11-08

9. The Eating Contest

In an eating contest between the platoons Bilko puts his money on a new member of the platoon nickname...More

In an eating contest between the platoons Bilko puts his money on a new member of the platoon nicknamed 'The Stomach' only to find that he can only eat when he is depressedLess

30mins 1955-11-15

10. The Centennial

Bilko organises a pageant to celebrate 100 years of Camp Baxter but after some investigation finds tha...More

Bilko organises a pageant to celebrate 100 years of Camp Baxter but after some investigation finds that it does not show the camp in a very good lightLess

30mins 1955-11-22

11. Bivouac

When maneuvers come round again the Colonel is interested in which illness Bilko has in order to miss ...More

When maneuvers come round again the Colonel is interested in which illness Bilko has in order to miss out on the joys of marching through the countryside. In order to make him go the colonel uses reverse psychologyLess

30mins 1955-11-29

12. The Singing Contest

Bilko hears of a singing contest in Miami and to get away from the bitterly cold weather he enters the...More

Bilko hears of a singing contest in Miami and to get away from the bitterly cold weather he enters the platoon but on hearing them sing he puts a bet on for them to lose. While he is putting on the bet a new platoon member is found to have a beautiful singing voiceLess

30mins 1955-12-06

13. The Twitch

Colonel Hall tells Bilko to provide an audience for a lecture on music. He finds that nobody wants to ...More

Colonel Hall tells Bilko to provide an audience for a lecture on music. He finds that nobody wants to come until they learn that the lecture will be given by a friend of the Colonel's wife and they can bet on the number of ' twitches' that she will give during the lectureLess

30mins 1955-12-13

14. The Reunion

When Bilko meets up with his old army buddies, he thinks that they are going to be so short of money, ...More

When Bilko meets up with his old army buddies, he thinks that they are going to be so short of money, that he is going to have to help them out , but it turns out that they have all been very successful.Less

30mins 1955-12-20

15. The Rich Kid

Bilko gets an idea to buy the local bar and grill, but he is stumped for cash, until he learns that on...More

Bilko gets an idea to buy the local bar and grill, but he is stumped for cash, until he learns that one of the platoon's new recruits, is heir to a steel fortune. So they play up to him in order to get him to invest in their scheme, but Bilko's conscience wins out in the end.Less

30mins 1955-12-27

16. Hollywood

Hollywood plans a film of the ' Battle of Kabuchi' and they hire Bilko as the technical adviser, but a...More

Hollywood plans a film of the ' Battle of Kabuchi' and they hire Bilko as the technical adviser, but after a couple of days he has taken over the whole production, and the film people want shot of him.Less

30mins 1956-01-03

17. The Investigation

A Congressional committee visit Fort Baxter to investigate waste and high living but Bilko has other i...More

A Congressional committee visit Fort Baxter to investigate waste and high living but Bilko has other ideas, he wants a pay rise insteadLess

30mins 1956-01-10

18. Kids In the Trailer

While babysitting for a member of the platoon Bilko panics when he finds that he can't change the baby...More

While babysitting for a member of the platoon Bilko panics when he finds that he can't change the baby's nappyLess

30mins 1956-01-17

19. The Revolutionary War

Bilko's aunt sends him a diary showing him that his great uncle Joshua was on the staff of George Wash...More

Bilko's aunt sends him a diary showing him that his great uncle Joshua was on the staff of George Washington so Bilko applies to become an officer but on reading the diary he discovers that Joshua was a traitor so Bilko keeps quiet and withdraws his applicationLess

30mins 1956-01-24

20. The Transfer

When the Colonel makes life difficult Bilko decides to bluff and puts in a transfer, but the Colonel c...More

When the Colonel makes life difficult Bilko decides to bluff and puts in a transfer, but the Colonel calls the bluff and Bilko is on his way, but at his new camp life is to easy and Bilko hopes he can find a way to get back to Camp BaxterLess

30mins 1956-01-31

21. The Rest Cure

During a heat wave Bilko discovers that the army have a rest centre in the Rockies but the trick is tr...More

During a heat wave Bilko discovers that the army have a rest centre in the Rockies but the trick is trying to persuade the doctors and the Colonel to let him go thereLess

30mins 1956-02-07

22. Dinner at Sowici's

When Bilko thinks that Joan is trying to trap him into marriage, he takes her to dinner at Sgt Sowici'...More

When Bilko thinks that Joan is trying to trap him into marriage, he takes her to dinner at Sgt Sowici's to see how bad marriage can be, but they are in for a surprise.Less

30mins 1956-02-14

23. Army Memoirs

When Sgt's Pendleton,Grover, and Sowici get Bilko busted to private, he gets his own back by pretendin...More

When Sgt's Pendleton,Grover, and Sowici get Bilko busted to private, he gets his own back by pretending to write a book on his army lifeLess

30mins 1956-02-21

24. Miss America

When Bilko asks for pictures of the platoons girlfriends Pvt Honnagar shows them a photo of a beautifu...More

When Bilko asks for pictures of the platoons girlfriends Pvt Honnagar shows them a photo of a beautiful girl taken years ago. they think it is his girl but they have a surprise in storeLess

30mins 1956-02-28

25. The Court Martial

When Zippo the ape is accidently inducted into the army the only way to get the army off the hook is t...More

When Zippo the ape is accidently inducted into the army the only way to get the army off the hook is to get Bilko as defense council and court martial the ape before anybody finds outLess

30mins 1956-03-06

26. Furlough in New York

Bilko and Joan Hogan go separately to New York and keep missing each other but when they meet up again...More

Bilko and Joan Hogan go separately to New York and keep missing each other but when they meet up again at Fort Baxter they find that they have somehow ended up with each others dog tagsLess

30mins 1956-03-13

27. The Big Uranium Strike

Bilko suspects that there are large deposits of uranium underneath Fort Baxter but he has to get rid o...More

Bilko suspects that there are large deposits of uranium underneath Fort Baxter but he has to get rid of the Colonel before he can start diggingLess

30mins 1956-03-20

28. Bilko and the Beast

When a new drill sergeant known as ' The Beast ' takes over at Fort Baxter Bilko and the platoon come ...More

When a new drill sergeant known as ' The Beast ' takes over at Fort Baxter Bilko and the platoon come up with a scheme to get rid of himLess

30mins 1956-03-27

29. The Physical Check Up

When Bilko tries to get out of a 20 mile hike the Colonel preempts him and allows him to miss the hike...More

When Bilko tries to get out of a 20 mile hike the Colonel preempts him and allows him to miss the hike Bilko is so shocked that he thinks the Colonel might be trying to get rid of himLess

30mins 1956-04-10

30. The Recruiting Sergeant

When Bilko gets a tip from a jockey on a horse he persuades the Colonel to take him on a recruiting dr...More

When Bilko gets a tip from a jockey on a horse he persuades the Colonel to take him on a recruiting drive to Topeka so he can get to a bookie and get a bet onLess

30mins 1956-04-17

31. Hair

Bilko's head is constantly being used by his barber to find a cure for baldness. The other three serge...More

Bilko's head is constantly being used by his barber to find a cure for baldness. The other three sergeants know this and while Bilko is asleep decide to play a trick on him, but Bilko has the last laughLess

30mins 1956-04-24

32. The Con Men

When Doberman gets a $500 windfall from an insurance policy, he loses it in a poker game with three co...More

When Doberman gets a $500 windfall from an insurance policy, he loses it in a poker game with three con men. Bilko gets it back by conning the con men, but then Doberman loses it again by being conned into buying the hotel from another con manLess

30mins 1956-05-01

33. War Games

Bilko is asked to be best man at a friends wedding but it coincides with a war game battle between the...More

Bilko is asked to be best man at a friends wedding but it coincides with a war game battle between the army and the national guardLess

30mins 1956-05-08

34. Bilko on Wall Street

Thinking his friend is a big man on Wall Street Bilko goes to stay but when he discovers that his frie...More

Thinking his friend is a big man on Wall Street Bilko goes to stay but when he discovers that his friend is just a clerk, Bilko sets out to get him a better job.Less